Mister Vacca and Pinocchia – Illness



- What a boring day, Mister Vacca!

- So what?

- Few customers, few deals: at this rate, the proceeds collapse!

- So what?

- Don’t you care about job security? Then let’s see what will you do if the store closes...

- I don’t see what I could do about it, Pinocchia...

- Well, at least you could worry a little...

- Would it change something?

- You are the personification of indifference...

- Bah...

- You look dead...

- I feel pretty good...

- Sure?

- Well... at least I think... can you feel my pulse?

- What?

- Now that you mention it, it seems to me that something is wrong...

- But Vacca, I was referring to your attitude...

- Well, but you said I look dead...

- No, I wanted to point out your cool and collected ways...

- It's true, you know? I don’t feel well. I feel I have the cool, too...

- Vacca, what are you saying?

- I'm going to lie down in the storage room...

- Vacca, don't exaggerate...

- A little rest is what I need...

- Oh My, how hypochondriac are you!

- Yes, I must also have some lines of hypochondria... what a bad time, everything keeps happening to me!

- Are you kidding?

- I have to go to a doctor...

- Vacca...

- It's this job’s fault, I don’t like being around people...

- Are you a misanthrope?

- What?

- It's a joke... I said you're a misanthrope.

- No, I'm just discreet...

- But...

- Well, I'm going. Can you inform the manager? I don’t want to be seen in these conditions...


  1. Introduction
  2. The queue
  3. Aggression
  4. Horoscope
  5. Selection
  6. Adverbs
  7. Pronunciation
  8. Family
  9. Obsessions
  10. Robbery
  11. Agreements
  12. Meditation
  13. Fashion
  14. Formalities
  15. Prank call
  16. Problems of consciousness
  17. Clarifications
  18. Pause
  19. Special offers
  20. Something in common
  21. Jealousy
  22. Saturn
  23. Illness



Why is a nickname more indicative compared to our name? Personal details are the result of the choice of others. Sooner or later, when we enter the world of work, those letters will become numbers. On the other hand, a nickname is linked to a really happened event or to a personal trait. In a manner of speaking, it reveals our true identity.
In consumer society, where all echoes are adulterated - Karl Marx is the man of chocolate with the caramel layer and Che Guevara has killed Spider-Man - identity becomes a main topic. Keeping it and being involved as little as possible by the obsession with buying, is a primary matter.
Leopoldo Canapone, protagonist of Dear Customer, every day witnesses the procession of customers infatuated by the commercials and promotional offers. He also knoews a lot about nicknames and, above all, he had an identity. Aspiring actor, he was sure in the end he would enter the Cinecittà Studios. He wrong a few hundred meters. Years later, he stamped the card in the supermarket near to the film establishments, but after all, also it was art because, as a sales clerk, he had to wear a mask and smile to the audience.

The customer is a fucked customer and not a fucking customer.

Leopoldo Canapone 

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